Chapter 9: The Long-Lost Relative

It was lunchtime. Nutello was eating the pizza she had ordered. Dazzle was on the table, eating on a small piece of pizza Nutello has given her. Nutello leaned back on her chair, putting her legs on her desk in front of her, looking at the huge computer on the wall. She was in her top-secret headquarters that was still incredibly hard to get into as it did in the old headquarters. Nutello was on Skype, chatting with her brother Blackthorn.
"So...you're working for a meerkat now," Blackthorn said.
"Yep," nodded Nutello, taking a bite of pizza.
Blackthorn gave Nutello a look. "...Right...So--"
Suddenly, an alarm sounded. Nutello yelled out and fell out of her chair, and quickly got to her feet. "Everyone!" Nutello shouted into her walky-talky, "I'll deal with this!"
"No fair! I want to!" protested Nota Bene's voice.
"No, if it's Tiredblade Nutello deserves to catch him," said Milne's voice.
"See you Blackthorn," Nutello said to her brother, who, if possible, looked even more weirded out than before. Nutello turned the computer off and grabbed a machine gun, then ran out of the headquarters. No one was in the hallway despite the alarms were still blaring and red was flashing from the alarms. Nutello ran to the elevator and pressed the "up" button, and the doors closed and the elevator moved up. Nutello then grabbed some dark sunglasses and put them on her eyes for dramatic effect.
Finally, the elevator stopped moving. Nutello was in the porta potty. She then kicked the door open and held up her machine gun. "Alright,  come on out, fool! I know you're here to destroy my two years of work!" She looked around, growling. No one was there, but the alarm on the side of the porta potty was flashing, meaning there still was an unknown person on the territory. Nutello then saw rustling in the bushes.
"Show yourself and no one gets hurt!" she exclaimed, loading the machine gun.
Suddenly, the person stepped out of the bushes: a weasel with an old, beat-up straw hat, one front tooth, overalls, and a straw coming out of his mouth. Flies were buzzing around him. Nutello aimed the gun at him, suspecting he was a spy for Tiredblade. "Alright, who are you and who are you working for??" Nutello demanded, glaring at him through her sunglasses.
"Howdy, y'all!" he said in a strong hillbilly-like accent. He looked at the machine gun and didn't even seem scared of it at all. "Name's Yoho!"
"Yoho?" Nutello said, lowering her machine gun slightly. No one, not even an idiot like Tiredblade, would want this guy for a spy. But still, Nutello kept her machine gun close, just in case. "And who are you working for?" she asked.
"I'm from Alabama!" exclaimed Yoho. "I'm looking for my long-lost cousin, Cletus."
"Cletus?" Nutello echoed. "Well, I'm sorry, I don't know any guy named Cletus."
"Hey, is that right there a porta potty?" Yoho asked, "I've been travellin' fer...how long now...right, 'bout hundred an' somethin' miles!" Yoho then walked to the porta potty, walking in a strange fashion. Nutello looked at him weirdly, but then ran at him.
"Wait! Don't go in there!" she exclaimed, but Yoho had already walked inside. Nutello followed him inside, and Yoho flinched as he saw her.
"Geez! Can' a guy get any privacy 'round 'ere?" Yoho shook his head.
"This isn't a porta potty!" Nutello insisted.
"Sure looks like it! You're sure a loony wolf. Y'know, back in sweet 'ome Alabama, Uncle Billy Bob went huntin' fer wolves like you! Never saw 'im again!" Yoho said.
"Well, this wolf isn't one you can hunt," Nutello replied. "Now, you'd best get out."
"An' why in tarnation would I do that?" Yoho demanded.
"Because this isn't a porta potty!"
"You'd better darn tootin' prove it!"
Nutello sighed and "flushed the toilet". The floor beneath them began moving down, and Yoho looked at Nutello wildly. "What kinda wolf are yeh? Yeh'll never take me alive, or my name ain't--"
Yoho stopped when the elevator hit the ground. "See?" Nutello said, "this is an HQ. Not a porta potty."
"Hmm. Where's--" he began, but then Tiggerpaka's kits came running up.
"Nutello! Who's that?" asked Peanut.
"Why, hello dere, young'in!" Yoho grinned, revealing some missing teeth, "why, you is a meerkat, ain'tcha? Do you happen to know where my cousin Cletus is?"
"Cletus?" echoed Reese.
"Oh well. C'mon, miss, uh...miss..." Yoho looked at Nutello.
"Nutello," Nutello said.
"Ah! Nuthead! Got it," Yoho said.
Tiggerpaka's kits all giggled, and Nutello rolled her eyes. "Right...now, you're coming to see Tiggerpaka," Nutello said, pushing Yoho ahead of her, "and don't try anything funny or you're going to go watch Cletus from the sky. Understand?"
"You got it, Nuthead!" Yoho smiled.
Sighing, Nutello pushed Yoho along the hall. No one came out into the hall; it was empty except Nutello and Yoho, and Nutello had passed Butter and Cup, who were both trying to dig a hole in the ground as a trap; Nutello, however, stopped them before they could do so, and they both walked off, muttering something about how stupid their dad's minions were.
Nutello then approached Tiggerpaka's HQ, stepping on the flowery welcome cat in front of the spiked door. She pressed her paw on the scanner before it even asked her to do so, and the doors opened. Inside revealed the gigantic room, still the same as the old HQ. Yoho walked in. "Well, I'd be darn..." he whispered, marveling at the computers.
"Tiggerpaka!" Nutello called.
The giant chair turned around, revealing Tiggerpaka sitting on his high chair. "What?"
"Cousin Cletus!" Yoho exclaimed, running over to Tiggerpaka.
"Wha-??  SHHHH!" Tiggerpaka hissed, "my name is not Cletus!"
"Well, sure it is, Cletus! It's me, Yoho!" Yoho grinned.
Nutello stared in bewilderment. "You two are related?"
"I told you Cletus was here!" Yoho said.
"SHUSSSSH! My name is Tiggerpaka the Great, it's not Cletus!" Tiggerpaka growled.
"You're name ain't Tig-whats-it, yer name's Cletus! Did you hit your head again?" Yoho asked.
"It's not Cletus anymore! I changed it!" Tiggerpaka whispered. Unfortunately for him, however, Nutello overheard and giggled, but quickly put her paw over her mouth as Tiggerpaka glanced at her. "Yoho, just go home! I order you!"
"Aw, shucks, Cletus, you always acted like a leader," Yoho smiled.
"For your information, I am a leader. Emperor, in fact! Right Nutello?" Tiggerpaka nodded.
"Er--" Nutello began.
"See? Yoho, just go home now," Tiggerpaka said.
"I can't, Cletus! Alabama's hundreds o' miles away from 'ere! I took such a long time just to come visit yeh! I'mma rest 'fore I leave again!" Yoho insisted.
"No--" Tiggerpaka began, but he was interrupted as the doors opened.
A pretty female meerkat came in. "Oh, Tiggerpaka my dear...! Hello!" she smiled.
"Helga...!" Tiggerpaka put on a fake smile, and Nutello heard him mutter, "this day is just getting better and better."
"Golly, is that yer wife? She sure is purty, Cletus!" Yoho grinned, blushing.
"Oh, thanks--" Helga began, but then gave Yoho a look. "Cletus? Tiggerpaka, who is this?"
Tiggerpaka moaned and rolled his eyes. "Helga, cousin Yoho. Yoho, my wife, Helga."
"He's your cousin?" Helga asked, "but who's Cletus?"
Tiggerpaka sighed. "...Cletus...is my old name. But I am still Tiggerpaka the Great!"
Helga began laughing. "Cletus!" she exclaimed, falling over in laughter.
Tiggerpaka facepawed. "GUARDS!" he roared.
"No, no, I'm leaving!" Helga said, still laughing hard. Still howling with laughter, Helga left the HQ, and Tiggerpaka looked extremely annoyed. Yoho, however, seemed pleased, and he grinned at Tiggerpaka.
"Yer lucky to have 'er," Yoho said.
"Oh yeah, she's a bucketload of luck," Tiggerpaka rolled his eyes.
"Tiggerpaka, sir," Nutello said, "what shall we do with Yoho?"
"We're going to make him--" Tiggerpaka began, but eyed something in Yoho's overall pocket. Nutello came around and looked where Tiggerpaka was looking. Several sticks of dynamite were in Yoho's pocket, and Tiggerpaka looked at Yoho. "Yoho? What's that...in your pocket?"
"Just got me a few sticks o' dynamite," Yoho smirked, taking a stick of dynamite and tossing it in the air and catching it.
"And what do you do with it?" Tiggerpaka asked.
"I go fishin' with it!" Yoho said.
A big grin came on Tiggerpaka's face. "I like you!"

Author's Note:
I'm so glad I came up with the idea of Yoho (of course, some of my family helped out with ideas. xP).